Occasionally you’ll have to play a mini-game where you position Hamtaro in the right place so he can head a strawberry like a football. Occasionally you’ll go through every word you have until you do the right thing. Occasionally you won’t be able to proceed in the area you’re in until you find the right word and backtrack to that point. You pass these on to other Ham-Hams to help them with whatever problem they’re dealing with. When I say “puzzles” what I mean is… what do I mean? You meet other Ham-Hams and they tell you things such as stories or other Ham-Chat words. The more words you learn the more puzzles you can solve. So you get given a few to begin with and set off into the world to learn more words. It does seem rather odd that this fully-grown hamster does not understand basic words for ‘happy’, ‘tired’ and ‘hungry’ how has he been getting by all this time? Has he been writing down words on a pad and showing them to friends and family? Where did he buy this pad of paper, from a tiny WH Smiths? Who designed and built a WH Smiths so small only small animals can get in? There are so many questions. Ham-Chat is the secret language of the Ham-Hams whereby instead of using sensible words to describe and communicate they use slight variations or muddied portmanteaus of colloquialisms. How are you to convince your peers to abandon whatever they’re doing and head back to he clubhouse? You do this using Ham-Chat. As a small rodent, the human world is big and full of items that would appear normal to you and me. The boss of your hamster clubhouse has tasked you with locating all the other twelve hamsters and bringing them back for a special surprise. In it you play the titular Hamtaro, a lovable hamster with a heart as huge as his eyes. It is everything that I was hoping for and an extra box of chocolate carpets to boot. Even I, with my bat shit crazy view of the world, found myself exclaiming out loud, not in my head, actual audible sounds, of “Eh?” and “You what?” whilst playing it. I have played through the entire game and I am convinced it was designed by the deranged. I want to pretend that this is completely normal but it’s not. It follows the adventures of a group of SD (super-deformed and very cutesy) hamsters and it’s utterly insane. Hamtaro is a hugely popular Japanese series of anime, manga and video games. With this in mind, let me present you with a little review of the Gameboy Colour game ‘Hamtaro: Ham-Hams Unite!” Also, you may as well milk this for all it’s worth because everyone loves winding Kev up as much as I do. I do like to space these things out so that Kevin’s wrath does not come down on my like a ton of spiky, explosive bricks. I had two ideas for another post this month albeit they both stemmed from the same prospect of enraging Kevin and there is no way that I am going to post them within a few days of each other.
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